Dinosaurs might be extinct but apparently dinosaur erotica is well and truly alive. Brace yourself, because your precious childhood memories of The Land Before Time are about to be shattered into a million tiny pieces.
If you travel to the deepest, darkest depths of the internet you’ll find an Amazon account belonging to Christie Sims, the world’s best-known (and hopefully only) author specialising in Dinosaur erotica. You might recognise her from classics such as Taken by the T-Rex, Running From the Raptor and Ravished By the Triceratops. She describes herself as “a plain old, everyday Midwestern girl that lives a normal life” who happens to have “inner thoughts… filled with lusty thoughts of big, strong, powerful monsters having their way with beautiful maidens.”
In case your world hasn’t already been destroyed enough, I’ll leave you with a juicy excerpt from one her most acclaimed novellas, In the Velociraptor’s Nest, dug up by Jezebel:
Azog stood, back to the wall, clad only in damp buckskins, waiting for the beast to slash at her torso until she lay helpless and bleeding on the damp cave floor. She wondered if it would kill her first, or if her limbs would be sliced from her body as the beast gorged on her.
Instead, it reached out with a classed hand to snatch at her damp animal hide as it clung to one shoulder. Azog felt the kiss of sharp claws against her skin as the hide slid from her shoulder and exposed on naked, heaving breast. The raptor paused, curious, sniffing at her as she pressed desperately against the wall.
A reptilian tongue, stiff and hot, dashed out to lick at the tender, naked flesh so suddenly exposed. Azog gasped at the touch, then gradually relaxed as her body warmed to the intoxicating sensation of the beast’s flesh against her own.
She wasn’t sure if her sudden arousal was because of her earlier thwarted climax in the cool stream, or if she was just desperate for one last pleasant sensation before being torn limb from limb by the great, scaly beast. Either way, Azog relished the rasp of its tongue, hot and rough, on her sensitive skin.
It’s all about that reptilian tongue.
Head over to Christie Sims’ Amazon to get your own piece of Dinosaur erotica. Quick, before they sell out!
[Via Jezebel.]