Weekly updates:

Culture
Posted by

Weekly updates


“Guys don’t want to fuck cool.” I overheard this statement a little while ago, from a woman I might add. I went to argue it with my new girl power attitude with a “Who the fuck cares what they want to fuck?”, but I bit my tongue and have been sitting on this notion ever since.

There are lots of different types of girls in this world, obviously The Cool Girl (M.I.A), The Naturally Pretty Girl (Natalie Portman), The Glamour Girl (Ice T’s missus Coco), The Very Well Groomed Girl (Kim Kardashian Inc.), The Indie Girl (Kate Moss), The ‘I Can’t Do Anything Wrong’ Girl (Beyonce), The On-Trend Girl (Rihanna), The Odd Girl (Lena Dunham), The Androgynous Girl (Justin Bieber), The Sex-On-A-Stick Girl (Megan Fox), The Utter Weirdo (Yolandi Vi$$er), The Eurasian (Most American Apparel Models), The Quirky Girl (Katy Perry). I can go on and on and on (and on) but I am running out of examples for the different types of girls and I think you get the picture.

Whoa, guys are spoilt for choice! Gone are the days where they just preferred blondes or brunettes or they were either a legs or a boobs man. Now there are ass men and hair men and men who like chicks to wear sneakers and those that like us in pretty dresses with pretty hair and no makeup and high heels. I ask you gentlemen, who do you want to fuck if it is not the cool girl? Because they all seem to be pretty darn sexy.

Would a man who has someone like M.I.A. on his arm, someone dressed in a suit she found from a Sri Lankan market, Converse and a baggy t-shirt (but wears it like it is Versace and carries an attitude that is cool as ice), dump her for the first American Apparel Model looking girl dressed in itty bitty everything in skyscraper heels? Are they really that retarded?

I’m guessing that, as the eligible man pool gets smaller, (believe me, this pool is evaporating faster than free drinks at an art show) and as girls get more serious about choosing a mate, I find that we begin to mould and shape ourselves into becoming what we think guys want. No, it doesn’t have to be this way and as I have said many times before, it is us who have set this standard. You can’t give a child chocolate after dinner four nights in a row and then get mad at him when he expects it on the fifth.

It’s nice to be admired by a man. I don’t even hate it when truck drivers whistle at me as I’m walking down the street. This one time, a car full of fluoro-covered tradies performed mock fellatio on a banana at me as they drove on by and I gave them a thumbs up. (It was a very large banana.) On this day I was wearing a pair of Chucks, leggings and an oversized singlet. No cleavage and no high heels and my hair was up because it was dirty and I may have been eating McNuggets. Yes, I have considered that they may have been hollering at the McNuggets.

I think, quite possibly, that guys will generally want to partake in sexual intercourse with any female who is willing and/or attractive irrespective of personal style. But they’ll get serious about a woman who is serious about herself. No matter what her packaging might be.

Keep up with The Obnoxious Owl’s weekly ‘Shooting From the Hip’ column here.