Sometimes, boys tell lies just so that girls will have sex with them, and, yes, girls lie as well but it’s different. Usually the two scenarios go something like the following.
A boy will tell a girl everything he thinks she wants to hear. I am not talking about promises of a relationship or anything, just things like ‘You are so hot,’ and ‘I can’t stop thinking about having sex with you,’ or ‘I really feel that we connect on a certain level,’ you know… that kind of thing. This kind of communication usually happens through some kind of social media, whether it be Facebook or Gmail chat. Then, they start ‘liking’ all the girl’s photos and responding with witty comebacks to status updates which will sometimes include an ‘in-joke’ in order to make the girl feel special. Of course the girl is simply loving the attention. All girls love this kind of attention because it is like water on fire when it comes to the insecure girl’s self esteem. Or, it is like petrol on fire if we are talking about a woman with an ego. Both kinds of chicks have a distorted sense of self-worth, which means one thing: easy prey.
The lie that the girl tells is not only to the dude but also to herself when she says that she is completely up for no-strings-attached sex.
See, the thing is, at the time of communication, the girl will actually believe it when she says that she is just ‘up for some fun’ and the poor desperate lad on the hunt for some pussy will lie to himself by thinking that he has finally hit jackpot. The truth is, their little escapade is more than likely going to end in tears or worse, an unfriending on Facey.
When will we learn that there are always strings? Loads and loads of tiny little strands that link ours brains to our emotions which strengthen when a human encounters intimacy or any kind of connection. Because of biology being what it is (an asshole) women feel this pull even more than our lovely little penis-bearers because of that one hormone that I can’t remember the name of but I think I wrote about in another column somewhere.
It’s a difficult one though, because sometimes we just want to get laid and leave it at that. Ideally, it would be an explosive one-night stand where no numbers are exchanged. But the thing with having sex with a friend, or someone you have gotten to know over endless raunchy internet conversations, is that it is usually just so much better. Why? Because some intimacy and emotion was involved. That is what makes all sex great sex: the care factor. Some people are better at turning that factor off once the knot has been tied in the condom. But most of us, and mainly women, are left wanting more.
‘But this is not what we agreed on!’, he’ll say. And she will be left feeling rejected because she is wondering what the hell is so bad about herself that he could not be interested in turning their erotic encounters into emotional ones. Also, let’s not forget there is the embarrassment factor. She will be embarrassed that she could not live up to her end of the deal and he will feel shitty about, well, feeling shitty. I’m not saying that these cases have a 100% failure rate but that would depend on what you consider a fail. I guess if the sex was mind-blowing then that could be the silver lining in what could become a very awkward friendship going forward.
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