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Weekly updates


Isn’t the internet amazing? I mean you can get up to-the-second-news as it unfolds before you in real time. That’s proper sci-fi shit. Can you imagine your grandparents following World War Two via twitter? Things have fundamentally changed in the way we consume media, and that’s a beautiful and revelatory thing. Unfortunately, most of the time we piss away the potential of this amazing technology by reposting Miley Cyrus twerk gifs (guilty) and posting in online comment sections (not guilty).

Anyway, if you’re an Australian who likes the kind of music that we like – you’ve probably heard that Frank Ocean has cancelled his remaining Australian tour dates due to illness (including his Splendour In The Grass show). This sucks. Definitively. But it’s not the worst thing to ever happen – off the top of my head rape, murder, and famine all out-rank missing out on a neo R&B gig in terms of shitty things that happen on a daily basis. But according to a vocal minority online, this is apparently the worst thing anyone has ever experienced since your parents got you that Sega Genesis instead of a Super Nintendo that one Christmas.

Here’s what a casual five minutes browsing Facebook turned up.

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It’s true. It’s totally unfair that Frank Ocean got sick after being on tour constantly for a month. It’s especially unfair that he sold out two dates – and spent the first show apologising on stage for his illness while he was obviously physically uncomfortable.

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Of course this guy is from Sydney.

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I’m embarrassed by proxy that this guy has the same name as me, and he actually spells it correctly. On behalf of all Seans with shaky claims to Irish ancestry – I’d like to apologise for this dude.

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Seriously though – fuck this guy. 

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THIS ISN’T EVEN A PUN – How about ‘There Will Be Tears’, ‘Dream Killa’, ‘Cry me an ocean’, ‘Frankly my dear we do give a damn’ or literally anything else. Or just walking away from your keyboard.

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I assume that people who respond to general Facebook announcements like they’re personally addressed to them individually are the reason we have warning labels like this on hair dryers. 

Anyway, my take home point is that everyone should probably just count to ten before they type out a comment online. Sure, everyone has a right to feel disappointed, but the guy is legitimately ill. It’s a weird logic to berate someone you’ve paid money to see for cancelling a show that by his own admission will be substandard. Right?

Or maybe I can just afford to be philosophical because I saw the Frank Ocean show last night?

umad