Weekly updates:

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Weekly updates

In a clear attempt to curb the horrendously hung-over from endlessly debating whether McDonald’s breakfast closes at 10, 10:30 or 11am (it’s definitely 10:30), the ubiquitous chain have listened to consumer feedback and finally made breakfast items available 24 hours, seven days a week.

The menu will see all the old classics, including the Bacon and Egg McMuffin, Sausage and Egg McMuffin, hash browns, and hotcakes all available at any time of the day, so your fantasies of shamefully eating these items in the cover of night are finally a reality. Drunken revellers will now be able to sloppily chomp down a Sausage and Egg without the guilt derived from the sun rising around them, while parents who have exhausted their go-to meal ideas can surprise their children with “breakfast for dinner”, an option that is just as fun as it is depressing.

Most upsettingly however, is the news that this is simply a trial period that will be taking place in Macca’s restaurants across Wollongong and the Illawarra. There are plans in motion for it to eventually expand across the country, but it will move out to the Gold Coast next. Let’s hope for their sake there’s a nationwide roll out sooner than later; being directly responsible for a spate of reckless interstate driving seems like a public relations disaster just waiting to happen.

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