The New York Post is pushing the assertion that skateboards are now the ‘it’ accessory of middle-aged men trying to get their libido back. Profiling a dude named Cyril Therien, as “he gracefully weaves in and out of street traffic like a fish in water” and rocks up to a trendy eatery, the Post practically make skateboards out to be like a trawling net for fit blonde girls in their twenties. “This thing is a chick magnet”, says Therien.
The Post, however, somehow missed what anyone outside of a corporate circle can see from their feature photo. Their poster-boy of middle-aged skating isn’t a skater at all. The dude mall-grabs his Girl deck like it’s a foreign object. He doesn’t need the $1000 electric skateboard to be a poser like they say, he is one already. Endorsing the swagger-jacking of skate culture by a yuppy, who has spent more time on his LinkedIn profile than learning how to skate, is a huge ‘Fuck You’ to skateboarders who still slay in their 30s and 40s, and don’t do it just to pick-up chicks.
The article even sneak disses the culture they’re peddling, calling it a mode of transportation “that most kids ditch in middle school”, and failing to realise it is a means of expression for a number of generations.
Okay, The Post isn’t a skate mag, it’s not their perogative to cover skate culture, but they have and they fucked it up. What they’ve done is try to expose some burgeoning sub-culture of men battling their mid-life crisis with skateboards because “it’s cheaper than therapy”. There are moments in the article that you’d be safe to question whether Click Hole wrote it. Especially when it notes that Therien plans to start a blog called ‘Dapper Deck’ that explores his sartorial and “sporty” aspirations. Supposedly this blog will be full of recounts of his triumphant encounters with the opposite sex that have been facilitated by skateboarding, while wearing bespoke Italian suits and impossibly heeled dress shoes. Onya mate. Do a kickflip.
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