White privilege remains a highly sensitive topic in America, as this week’s episode of The Combat Jack Show proved, as Premium Pete voiced his frustrations with Toure’s blanket statements about whites. The hip-hop world, having flipped the script by marginalising White Rap for so many years, has finally succumbed to the pressure of White Rap Privilege. While previous hip-hop palefaces required a co-sign – Run-DMC backed the Beastie Boys, Dr. Dre supported Eminem – the emergence of super-white MCs with no obvious association to established black rapper dudes has been on the up and up.
Asher Roth was able to parlay his “Preppy Howdy Doody” image into a popular single (I Love College) and a major label album (Asleep In The Bread Aisle) based entirely on a goofy frat house stoner video and rudimentary rapping abilities. Despite his debut only selling 200,000 copies, he signed a new deal with Def Jam in 2011 and has yet to release a follow-up. Is this part of some kind of White Rap affirmative action program? Or are there plans to market him as the pasty-faced alternative to Wiz Khalifa? The only notable thing about Roth is the fact that he’s the rap game David Spade, albeit a little taller. But because his lack of melanin opens him up the whole white college crowd who found Eminem to be “too black sounding”, he gets a permanent pass.
The case of Mac Miller is even more troubling. This guy doesn’t bring anything new to the table other than a resemblance to Teen Wolf via all the fur on the side of his face, and the fact that he’s small enough to live in a Smurf-style mushroom house. Miller seems to have cornered the market on happy-go-lucky rap in an attempt to appear on a Lucky Charms cereal box in the future, and acts so entitled that he tried to play Lord Finesse “like Nintendo” before he was hit with a lawsuit and paid up. While his Blue Slide Park managed the impressive feat of being the first independently released rap album to take the #1 spot on the Billboard charts since 1995, he seems to have become a media darling of sorts, with MTV2 giving him a reality show called Mac Miller and the Most Dope Family, Complex naming him their “Man Of The Year” for 2012 and the well publicised feud with professional douchebag Donald Trump.
Why exactly should we give a shit about this guy though? He can make words rhyme, seems to appeal to the stoner crowd who enjoy their music softer than a melted marshmallow that’s been held over a campfire and resembles a furry Smurf. Clearly, this is what Middle America has been waiting for: a diminutive, goofy white kid who digs skateboards and Miller Lite and smoking weed. Finally, someone they can relate to! No more do cracker rap guys need to rely on being “crazy” to compensate for any lack of “street credibility”. Even Cage, who spent years being mad at Slim Shady for blowing up on the “insane white guy” ticket, finally had the confidence to start looking like an emo and rolling with Shia LaBeouf. White guys of America with passable rapping skills, your time is now!
Keep up with Robbie’s weekly ‘No Country for Old (Rap) Men’ here.