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Weekly updates

If you’re a curious fan, a litigious lawyer or a famous person, you might wanna read this: a reddit thread about people’s sexual encounters with the stars. It goes without saying that this is a bunch of essentially anonymous people talking shit on the internet, so remember that anything said may be a work of fiction or falsehood. And here we go.

User BobDolesPotato writes that a “friend of a roommate’s mother fucked DMX. we got his number from her cell phone but his answering machine message was just him barking for 30 seconds.”

Meanwhile DudeManBroSloth claims that “this chick at my school hooked up with Based God when he preformed at our 4/20 spring jam festival thing and when she woke up in his hotel room he was gone, there was like 23 dollars and a little bag of really shitty weed by the bed. hilarious.”

dab420 doesn’t mince words: “I know a girl that let Diplo fuck her in the ass.”

And urgencyy feels like he has a deep bond with Jody Highroller, writing that “My ex fucked Riff Raff. Can’t offer many details, on account of the fact that I hate her a lot, but me and him are now eskimo brothers so that’s kind of cool?”

Flocka gets great customer feedback, relayed by Calvin0433: “Someone I used to go with fucked Waka Flaka. She said he had a huge ding ding.”

And, of course, J-Law appears in a weirdly endearing tale. As laxatives writes: “I made small talk with Jennifer Lawrence a few times when I was working at a country club pool. I guess I kept eyeing her and one day some mom or older woman or whatever came by and told me she (Jennifer) wasn’t interested.”

Oh, and here’s dukfuk to remind us that reality may not be as fanciful as some of these stories suggest: “I’m dating Ariana Grande. Oh wait no, I’m dating my left hand. I always get them two confused.”

Read the thread in full on reddit.

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